Dating Violence Dynamics – Emotional and Verbal Violence

Click the boxes to learn more about the detrimental effects of emotional and verbal violence.

• WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE

  The abuser controls a victim by:

  • Threatening to harm the victim, his/her family, friends, property, or pets
  • Threatening to commit suicide if the victim leaves him/her
  • Using size, movements (ex: holding up fist), or voice to intimidate his/her victim
  • Calling the victim names, using slurs, or offensive language to cause emotional pain
  • Isolating the victim from friends, family, and those who may help him/her get out of the relationship
  • Violating the victim’s privacy by sharing private information with others (outing, sharing private photos, etc.)

• HOW IT FEELS FOR THE VICTIM

  When an abuser uses emotional and verbal violence to control a victim, a victim may experience:

  • Fear of leaving the abuser
  • Psychological trauma as a result of the abuse
  • Fear of the abuser or others
  • Shame, guilt, responsibility, or embarrassment
  • Obligation to do what the abuser says
  • Feelings of loneliness and feelings of deserving the abuse

• IMPACT ON VICTIM

  Emotional and verbal violence can:

  • Cause problems with focusing in school, which can lead to a decline in grades or withdrawals
  • Alienate victims from his/her friends, school groups, sorority/fraternity, or team
  • Prevent students from participating in clubs or athletics
  • Lead to further victimization as a victim is scared into staying in a relationship

• CONSEQUENCES FOR ABUSER

  Dating violence is a crime. If you abuse a partner, you face:

  • A ruined reputation
  • Conviction and jail time
  • Expulsion or suspension from the university
  • Suspension from sports teams
  • Disciplinary action from your fraternity or sorority
  • Alienation from friends and family
  • Costs from court fees and restitution.